Personal Assistant June 4, 2008

It looks like we are going to close tomorrow afternoon on the house!  The sellers were able to make arrangements with all the lien holders, to sell the house free and clear.  We are excited and nervous all at the same time.

For the last 6 1/2 years, Master and I have been trailer trash.  We’ve been living in a trailer that we own on a rented lot.  While I had a billion reservations when we first moved in, the living expenses were cheap and allowed us to save enough money for the down payment and still have a reserve in savings for emergencies.  It ended up being a wonderful place to call home, Master was right (no surprise there).  We put a for sale ad in the paper two weeks ago, and last night we had two offers on the place.  I completely understand why people use Realtors, after this experience.  It’s so hard not to get wrapped up in people’s stories.  It has to be easier not to get to know potential buyers, even briefly, so that you don’t want to make things easier for them some how.  Apparently both Master and I have larger softer sides than even we realized.

Master asked me to call the lower of the two potential buyers this morning and give her the bad news.  He new that is was a horrible task, but what good is a slave if you can’t make her do things you don’t want too?  I called this morning, and blessedly, got her voice mail.  I left a message and figure that’s the end of that.

I also spent a bit of time setting up the new utility accounts, ordering new windows, and setting up the few workmen we’ve hired to help us do some repair work.  It’s so exciting and overwhelming, but just having the forward motion is a comfort.  We plan on staying in our trailer through the end of the month to do the repair, cleaning, and painting before moving in.

Being Master’s personal assistant is a huge part of my slave “job description” sometimes its quite pleasant and sometimes not so much.  The interesting thing is, that in doing alot of these tasks I feel closer to them, more like they are somehow just as much mine.  The house is in both our names, but there is no doubt in my mind to whom it belongs.  Its good that I take pride and ownership of my tasks and doing them well for Master, however; its a good reminder to keep myself humble and remember who does have the final say around here.

Unspoken Communication May 16, 2008

I think I’m very intune with my Master.  We’ve been together a little while now (8 years tomorrow), so we have enough experience with each other to read body language, emotions, etc.  Its amazing to me sometimes the amount of communication that goes on without speaking.

Master is deaf in one ear, so sometimes He has a hard time hearing people, especially in places where there is a lot of background noise.  He has a way of looking at me when He didn’t quite hear what was said, that lets me know to repeat it to Him.  I can tell right away what He needs and I know how to help, I like that and so does He.

When Master is stressed or overwhelmed, I feel it.  I take it on and try to find ways to bring pleasure and offer help, when appropriate.  When Master is sad, I weep.  When His father died, I felt that sadness so deeply for Him.  When Master is happy, I laugh with the gladness.  There is, of course, “the look” too, but that’s not what this post is about.

I take it all on, as if its my own emotions coming from within.  This is a blessing and a curse.  It means I’m deeply in tune with my Master, which is good.  It also means, I’m not sure how to handle my own emotions sometimes without His lead, and that can be bad.  I can be exceedingly happy, however; if He’s stressed or overwhelmed my own happiness is overshadowed.  Conversely, if I’m sad, His happiness overshadows my sadness bringing me joy.

I suppose in the end, that’s my job.  Help absorb Master’s life so that I can bring Him pleasure and joy and in some way make His life a little easier.  The trick for me is make sure that I help in a way that is submissive and not in a way that leads to me doing things in the guise of helping that get in the way of obedience and submission.

Caffeine Drip, Please May 7, 2008

We still don’t have approval from the seller’s bank.  I hate the waiting.  I Hate the Waiting!  In the meantime, we’re moving ahead as if its ours, working on getting bids for improvement work, etc. 

The amount of work, phone calls, paperwork, etc. is overwhelming and the majority of it falls on me.  Master doesn’t have a job that allows for phone calls, call backs, etc., I do and as Master’s slave and assistant that’s my job.  It’s a lot to juggle I don’t mind saying.  There’s just so much to do and sometimes when I hit a brick wall, I don’t know where to go next or need to wait for Master’s call/direction losing time and momentum.  Oy, why are all the deadlines so tight on real estate deals, except for the foreclosing bank’s approval? They have the gold so they make the rules, I suppose.  In the end, I have great faith that everything will or won’t happen as its supposed too, but at the same time my patience is wearing thin with the seller’s bank.

All this juggling of extra duties into an already full daily schedule, got me thinking about laziness and slavery.  I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s no room for laziness in slavery or at least in the type of service slavery my Master requires.  My job is to do what Master requires without worrying about being tired or stressed or overwhelmed.  I am to keep Master informed at all times and He’ll remove things if He sees its getting to be too much, but in the meantime its not for me to complain or whine or even yawn.  I just need to suck it up and somehow hook myself up to a caffeine drip until the time for rest arrives.

I don’t mind hard work and by nature I’m not lazy, but the lifestyle isn’t the fantasy of being caged with nothing to do but wait to be used for Master’s pleasure and locked away again.  Slavery is work and Master as boss is way more demanding than the boss who signs my paycheck.  It comes down to focus, as most everything does for me.  I have to keep focused on my duties as Master’s property and our goals whether its M/s goals or property ownership goals.